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Sheiky Reviews Cypress Hill Live at The Observatory



shiekHello you intelligent pieces of garbage, finally the Fucking Legend gets to take a break from reviewing horseshit albums and I get to go back to my roots of reviewing hip hop shows and who better to Review than those Grasshopper dick, erectile dysfunction, Senile grandfather arthritis having no good fucking estooges the Cypress Hill. On this night they were scheduled to perform at the Observatory in the Santa Ana, it was a change of scenery for them as they usually perform at gay bars since there manager the Penis Barkhoe has been booking them at his hang out spots.


There set time was at 11pm which left plenty of time to I go home after the Dr. Greenthumb show to I get ready and look like the pimp. It was a chilly night so instead of my dick be the 10 inches it was only 8 inches on this night. I left my palace around 8 so I could be there early and hang out with all the pieces of trash there. I get there around 9 and go to the will call and the dumb motherfucker behind the window didn’t even ask for my name or my i.d., he already know who the fuck the Legend be and the Samoan security didn’t search me, they know I’m not that Hollywood faggot Hoke Hogan, I have the respect for the Superfly Jimmy Snuka. Much Respect to all my Uso’s!


Once I walk in I notice it was packed already, the standing room only area was at capacity. I went backstage right away because the openers weren’t worth the fuck, they should have had the fucking legend open up for the Cypress Hill  I would have suplexed the fucking stage and have everybody coked out going crazy with moshpits and  all the grandmothers in the crowd showing me there tits when I do the “Camel Zoo” and “Razor Ramon”, but then again fuck that I would have declined, the Cypress Hill should open up for me! (Shameless Plug Time!)

Anyway I hang out with the Peter Sobat and The Frank Freeman aka the artist formerly known as Phaze to we smoke the Marijuana and talk the shit, but then the fucking Penis Barkhoe say how did you get back here and that he didn’t put me on the list to I get backstage, I respect and love him bubba cause he know how to fuck around like the Legend but he know better then to fuck with me cause I beat the fuck outta him and leave him with a broken finger like I did that fucking estooge Kenji, I left that piece of garbage looking like the Uncle Sam pointing everywhere he went, The B-Real thought Kenji was pointing him in the right direction to go fuck himself! Your Kung Fu is no match for my Camel Clutch motherfucker!


Finally it was time for the Cypress Hill to go on stage, this time the B-Real didn’t get wheelchaired to the stage, he say “fuck that I wanna be like the Kobe Bryant and walk out on my own power”, I have to give it to him just like the Kobe did with a torn achilles the B-Real managed to walk to the stage with a torn vagina. The Hitman July G. (Julio) dropped the needle on the record and shit popped off, everybody go crazy jumping around with there hands in the air and moshing, about half way through the set this Dog Catcher named Kurupt made a special appearance on stage, I don’t know they said he was from this Dogg Pound in Long Beach, people went crazy for him though. All around it was a great show with lots of energy which led to a good time just the way a hip hop show should be, I don’t think its possible for anyone to say they’ve been to a Cypress Hill Show and be disappointed unless you attended one at a gay bar and the B-Real didn’t have the god damn common courtesy to give you a reach around….FUCK THE HOKE HOGAN!



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